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Today

Two Zombies sat in line at the Canadian / US border outside Buffalo, NY. We’d been obsessing over the last hour (it was a long line) that they’d be let through. We were traveling incognito. Nobody knew we were zombies, one of us had been dead for a few years. The other was only recently deceased. Thankfully, neither of us smelled (well Blair would tell you otherwise…but that was breakfast’s fault…eggs are delicious, but they always have that effect on me) or showed any real signs of decomposition.

I was zombie Eric Richardson. A mild-mannered office-worker from Appleton Wisconsin, coming back into my home country for the first time after a long absence. He (it feels weird to say…but…) was Blair Hamilton a cute, small, kind of effeminate man with a big smile and gregarious personality.

Don’t worry Americans, we weren’t coming to eat your brains or spread our undead plague. We were just two dead people who had business to attend to…

A few days ago…

“Johnny! I got an audition!” Blair yelled as she flew in through the front door. We’d been living together for a few weeks now. Life was great, the sex was amazing, and I thought we’d live happily ever after…but life wasn’t so simple.

A little over two weeks ago…

Last night had been amazing, again. When we’d gotten home from our date (Drag Queen Bingo…she won, of course!) Blair had been even hornier than usual. On the drive home she’d been fondling and groping and nuzzling, promising deeper and dirtier things to come. As the door opened, she crashed into me, mouth engulfing mine, her tongue diving deep into my mouth as she furiously worked my belt and pants into an open condition.

I’d been hard on and off all night. Blair had been groping me under the table most of the night, and between that and just generally being close to the sexiest being in the universe had kept me on edge. All that to say; my cock sprung out of my jeans like a dog being let out of a kennel.

Blair dropped to her knees immediately and began to suck on it. We were standing in the open doorway of our apartment. It was after 11, so I hoped there wouldn’t be any foot traffic, but still I glanced around with worry…at least until I was too distracted to worry anymore.

Blair took me all the way into her throat. This was the first time since our first night together that she’d done this, and it seemed like she was bound and determined to keep going…only the smooth skin of my pubic area stopped her from devouring my entire body. She squeezed her throat and elicited a massive groan from me, then pulled back quickly and wetly, gasping for air before she dived back down onto my cock.

She popped up again and gasped “Use me, Johnny! Fuck my mouth!”

The electricity of the shock of feeling my cock sheathed in her mouth again, and her dirty talk did release the wild animal in me, and I did as I was told. I pushed the back of her head and drove into her face, then back slightly, feeling her suction trying to pull me back in, I obliged and rammed into her throat again.

I wasn’t normally the ‘rough sex’ type. Or, as my ex-wife would have said “He’s as square as they come in the bedroom”.

If only she could see me now. Animal Johnny fucked Blair’s face. She was gasping and slobbering, somehow in a sexy way as I increased my intensity.

“Oh Fuck! Blair…here it comes!” I yelled and she pulled off and started jacking me furiously.

This is new! I thought as she stroked me, her small, soft hands squeezing and releasing slightly as she went up and down my cock. Moments later I erupted, and ropes of my essence blasted out, covering her perfect face. “Oh fuck, baby! You like that! You like my cum all over your face?” I blurted, as I kept ejaculating onto my love.

My loads had been huge…I don’t know if it was the long hiatus from my time in the nuthouse, the drugs I was on, what she was feeding me, or if it was just some kind of sexual rejuvenation caused by Blair, but regardless, I was producing volume!

In a moment of post-nut clarity, I saw my love with semen running from her forehead and eyes down, dripping from her chin onto the tile of our entryway, she was puffing and gasping, eyes closed as she just let herself kneel there.

I felt a bit guilty (I know…don’t kink shame yourself Johnny! But hey…I am what I am). “Oh baby, I’m sorry! I think I got a bit carried away…are you ok?”

“Quit being so nice Johnny!” she snapped and looked up at me, arm wiping the semen from her eyes.

I didn’t know what to say…so of course, I said the wrong thing. “Uhhh…sorry!”

“God Damn it, Johnny!” she said, exasperated, “I wanted you to treat me like a dirty whore, and you did, there’s nothing to apologize for, eh?”

I had no idea what was going on. I am, and always have been, kind of a moron when it comes to other people’s emotions. My mouth worked, but no words came out, I just kind görükle escort of stood there like a confused fish.

Blair got to her feet. “I’m going to go take a shower. Let’s just call it a night ok, Johnny?”

I nodded dumbly and she walked away, the bathroom door closing maybe just a little harder than normal behind her.

I heard the click of the door behind me in the hallway and the sound of footsteps. Fuck…well we gave somebody a show!

I waddled in through the doorway and shut it behind me. Then stopped to collect myself.

What had I done to make her mad? I thought things were going great…we’d had fun. I hadn’t noticed anything ‘off’ all night (not that you would you blind idiot…you’re not exactly captain empathy).

A little piece of me wanted to get mad and storm into the bathroom and demand an explanation. But the smarter part of me decided to let her be for the moment. I’d never been a fighter…I’m one of those guys who bursts into tears when he’s angry…not a good look! So, I decided just to get ready for bed.

I tidied up the mess from breakfast and lunch in the kitchen and got the dishwasher running. I heard a little yelp from Blair when the machine engaged. Oops…guess hot water is a limited supply…oh well serves her right for being a bitch! Yeah, maybe I wasn’t good at mad, but I could do petty pretty well.

Dishes done, I undressed and got in bed. Turning out the lights and putting on the covers. I turned my back to Blair’s side of the bed and closed my eyes.

She came in a few minutes later. I could feel her warmth slide under the covers, but I pretended to be sleeping already. After a moment, she kissed me on the shoulder, then rolled onto her side facing away from me. That was the first night since we’d been together that she didn’t sleep in my arms. I lay there, a cold pit in my stomach, for what seemed like hours.

I was sure I’d wake up in the morning and she’d be gone. I obsessed over what I could have done wrong or differently. I knew I’d been petty, but by then it’d been too late, what did I do at Bingo? I wanted to wake her up and hash it out…but common theme to my life’s story, I was an idiot, and decided that if she wanted to talk, she’d talk to me.

As time passed, I grew more and more stressed. I was legitimately afraid she’d be gone if I let myself sleep. Part of me knew it was crazy talking, but that part of me wasn’t being listened to at the moment, and I felt a panic attack coming on. I started shaking, and my chest clenched. My breath skyrocketed.

It must have been the shaking or the hyperventilation that alerted Blair because I heard a voice, “Johnny! What’s wrong? Are you ok? You’re shaking?”

That was it, I burst, “What do you think?!?” I blurted, “You’re all I have…I’m living for YOU, and now you’re mad…what did I do? Did I say something? Did you realize that I’m too boring for you? If you’re going to dump me, just rip off the Band-Aid…don’t string me along, ok?” I couldn’t take it anymore, and got out of bed, storming out of the room and slamming the door behind me.

I found myself in the bathroom, un-screwing the cap from my anxiety medication, I needed a Xanax badly. I wondered briefly if I should just down the whole thing…let the problem solve itself…but then a voice came from the doorway.

“Johnny, it’s ok.” She said softly. “It’s not you…you’re perfect and I’d be a fool to lose you! I love you, remember?”

I paused and looked over. Her face was red, eyes teary. Her lower lip was quivering. She was standing there in a black tank-top and panties. Not the sexy kind, the comfy briefs she liked to sleep in. She had a dejected look on her face.

“Well, what is it then?” I blubbered. “I’m just a big dumb idiot, I know, but I can’t figure what went wrong? We were having fun, weren’t we?”

She sighed, and nodded, “Yeah, it was fun…and nothing went wrong, per-se…this is a ‘me’ problem.” She said, sadness in her voice. “Come on, let’s go sit on the couch. I’ve been meaning to talk to you for a couple of days…but…well we’ll get to it.”

She held out a hand, eyes imploring and full of love. I sniffed and took it, and she led me to the couch. We cuddled together in our favorite corner, pulling our favorite blanket over. I was in my big-spoon position, and she was in front of me nestled into me. It was my favorite place to be in the world, and suddenly I felt much safer.

“I’m sorry for being a blubbering idiot.” I said, much calmer after a couple of silent minutes.

“I’m sorry too Johnny. I should have talked to you sooner.” She said.

“Well, I’m here now,” I said, “And I promise to listen without judgement, ok?”

She sighed, and it was quiet for a little bit. Finally, her voice came out. “Johnny, I’m an independent person…for better or worse, I have a really hard time being taken care of.” She paused, and I made an mmm-hmm noise and gave her a squeeze bursa eskort but knew better than to interrupt until she had made her point.

“It’s hard out there for a girl like me. It’s hard to find work, hard to find money to pay for treatments, even in Canada it’s a struggle, in other countries it’s worse. Yeah, things are covered, if you’re willing to wait and jump through hoops, but it’s hard to ‘be patient’ when who you really are is trapped inside screaming to be let out.”

I lay there and listened. In our blissful week-ish together there hadn’t been a lot of “serious” talk…we were having too much fun. I realized that there was so much I didn’t even know about her; what was her situation medically? What did it feel like to be in transition? What challenges did she have to go through on a day-to-day basis just to be Blair?

Yeah, of course I knew all the stereotypical bullshit about pronouns and which bathroom to use, but I’d never thought deeper than that surface stuff. She went on.

“Sure, lots of people have supportive families, friends, workplace, etc. but a lot of us don’t. Girls like me. We have to figure things out alone.

There are lots of men who want to knock a tranny off their bucket list, Johnny…and well I’ve been really broke…I never wanted to be with that kind of person either. I’m looking for real love, Johnny, a partner… But once, when things were at their darkest and I had no money, no job…I did…I let a man pay me for sex. It was awful…a couple days later, you met me.

I wanted to protest that I loved her, that I didn’t see her as anything but purely herself, I wasn’t like those guys…but the smart side of me prevailed and I kept quiet.

“Johnny, I know you aren’t one of those, guys. I wouldn’t be with you if I thought you were just sightseeing…but…I still don’t want a sugar daddy. I need to take care of myself. I never hated myself more than after I took that man’s money.” She looked so ashamed and broken, it nearly broke my heart.

I was starting to see where this was going.

“I feel like a whore Johnny…you’re paying for everything. That big pile of money that seemed like such a blessing is starting to feel like a curse.” She said. “Before you defend yourself, I know you don’t feel that way…like I said, this is a me-thing, I totally realize it…but you can’t control how you feel, even if what you feel is bullshit.”

“But you’re doing everything!” I couldn’t stay quiet. “All I’ve been is a burden to you…yeah there’s the money, but honey that is Eric Richardson’s money…as far as I’m concerned, he’s dead and the money is yours, finders-keepers!” I paused, then continued. “Since I’ve been here you’ve taken care of me, you’ve fed me, you’ve cleaned me, you’ve showed me around town, introduced me to friends, even given me a place to live! If anyone here is a leech it’s me!”

“Johnny, I don’t want to get mad…I love you, but please, this is about me today, ok? We’ve both got our problems, but can we talk about how I feel tonight?”

I got my hackles up for a second, but then I really listened to her…” Fuck I’m sorry Blair…please forgive this big dumb idiot?”

“Or course I do…and there’s nothing to apologize for. Just let me talk this out, ok?” she said.

“Ok.” I agreed.

“It’s been a fun vacation, Johnny, but I need to get back to real-life. That means a job, and financially doing my part. And it’s not just about the money, Johnny, I love dancing. I love being on the road, and seeing new places, and eating the food, and I want to take you with me! As much as I love the time we’re spending in this apartment, there’s a whole world outside of it that I want to share with you too!”

“Oh!” I said, “Is that it? Well then let’s find you a job!” I said, then quickly, “Kidding! I know it’s not that easy! But really, I fully support you. What do you need me to do to help?”

“I haven’t worked since I started transitioning. Last time I danced professionally, it was as Blair Hamilton: Male backup dancer. I’ve never worked as a woman except a few tiny local things that barely count…and nothing since I was institutionalized for the first time over a year ago. I need to get in shape. I need to find contacts and see if my past resume even translates, or if people I worked with before would be willing to vouch for me now. There’s a lot of work to do!”

“How have you been getting by up till now?” I asked…how was I just asking this question now?

“Odd jobs, shitty jobs, and general chicanery…” she said. “I’ve waited tables, driven a Lyft, worked at various seasonal jobs, temped, you name it…just enough to skate by, eh? But nothing since a few weeks before I went into the hospital…I have literally zero dollars in my bank account, and maybe 200 dollars in cash lying around the apartment. Not counting your duffel bag.”

“Oh…” I said.

“Yeah…” she said. “Reality is a bitch, eh?”

“Yeah, bursa escort it is…but it’s better with you in it.” I said, kissing the back of her neck tenderly.

“Mmmm…Johnny, you know I love you, big dumb animal and all?” she rolled to her back and looked up at my face.

“Me love you too.” I said I my best dumb-Tarzan voice.

She giggled and pulled me in for a kiss.

It was different this time. This kiss was tender and soft, and it lasted a long time. She stroked my shoulders, and I put my hand on her face gently. There was no need for tongues, or wide-open mouths, or other oral gymnastics, we were just together, her soft lips on mine, sharing a long series of breaths. Finally, she spoke, “Tomorrow we get to work, ok? But right now, bedroom!”

I agreed wholeheartedly and let her pull me up from the couch. We walked together into the bedroom and then shared another kiss.

We held each other for a long time, this time the kiss got a bit less chaste. Her tongue darted into my mouth a little bit, then mine intercepted her. We played like that while I slowly dropped her panties to the floor.

I was already naked, I like to sleep that way, always have, so her hands had free access to me. She had her left wrapped around my cock and was gently stroking, while I continued undressing her, removing he tank top, and letting my hands wander across her hard nipples.

She shivered as I touched her chest and worked my way down her sides and belly, reaching for the promised land in her crotch with one hand while the other felt for her plump little ass.

As the intensity increased, I pushed her gently toward the bed, and when her legs hit the edge, she sat and started to pull me down toward her.

I resisted slightly, redirecting myself to my knees in front of her. “Let me take care of you first.” I said, looking in her eyes.

I could see a slight resistance, then she crumbled, “Oh, Johnny…please!”

I kissed around her lap, her belly, her inner thighs, then I pushed her gently to her back and dove deeper. Lifting her legs, I dove in between, kissing across the bottom of her ass-cheeks and the back of her legs before making my way inward.

My tongue came out to play, and I started to kiss and lick her balls. The skin of her scrotum was pulled tight into her, and her balls looked so cute tucked into her. I sucked and licked, and noticed her hand was gently stroking her cock. I kissed the base of her cock, but not wanting to disrupt her stroking, I worked in the other direction, down towards her ass. My tongue wandered through the area between her legs as I buried my face into her crotch. I could feel her hand against my face as she jerked more furiously. I pushed her leg up more and found the prize I had been working towards, her cute little asshole.

I let my tongue circle it, spreading her cheeks with the fingers of my other hand. The taste was indescribable, but not unpleasant. Finally, I could hear her begging moan, and gave her what she wanted. My tongue moved to the center, across her puckered hole. I lay it flat on her and pushed against her opening with a wet, licking motion. This seemed to drive her even harder, as I could feel her stroking grow more frantic. I formed my tongue into a point and delved inside of her. Shed pulled her leg up as far as she could, freeing my other hand, which I used to spread her open, giving me more room to delve. I darted in and out of her, alternating between licks, and gentle penetration until I felt her sack twitch against my forehead.

“Oh baby! I’m coming!” she moaned.

That was my cue, and I popped up and took her cock in my mouth just as she blew her load. It was salty and tasted vaguely fruity, probably from the pina colada’s she’d had tonight at bingo, and I enjoyed every drop, swallowing it all down.

I came up for air after that, wiping my face and climbing onto the bed. We both shimmied up the bed together as I kissed her on the neck and chest, running my tongue across her nipples and eliciting another small moan.

Her goosebumps may have been caused by me, I don’t know for sure, but I did know it was cold in the bedroom, so I pulled her under the covers with me as we continued to make out.

Finally, apparently, playtime was over, and she groaned, “You know what I want Johnny…please I feel so full and safe with you inside me!”

Joy spread through my body, and I reached for the nightstand and the lubricant. I rolled her on her side facing away from me and applied it to her pre-moistened hole, my finger sliding in at the tip easily, then delving deeper with a bit of pressure.

She gasped as I inserted one, then two more fingers, gently stretching and delving to get her ready for my cock, which was now rock-solid.

I removed my fingers and applied another dab of lube to the head of my cock, then pressed up against her from behind, arms wrapped around her torso while I gently kissed the back of her neck. “I want to be inside you so bad Blair!”

“Make love to me Johnny!” she murmured, and I obliged. The tip of my cock pressed against her ass, and she opened up for me. The now-familiar warmth of her tight ass engulfed my cock as I slid into her until there was no more of me to give.

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